or "Mattison Tried To Kiss Me Today." Whichever you prefer.
My exhaustion is complete. You know I haven't been sleeping properly, but last night I only slept a few hours and I worked all day today. Combined with that are the intense emotions and spiritual happenings of the middle of last night and the turmoil caused by my lately-ex boyfriend's doings an hour ago. In what state of mind would a person think that kind of action would ever be acceptable? Large rolling tears have been the result of my last four encounters with him and never do I see or talk to him without suffering from aching nausea afterword. I need to get away.
I am going to get away. In the fall, I am moving to Santa Barbara in search of education and sensational experience. It will probably be only one semester, but who knows what will befall me there. You know what Bilbo used to say, "It's a dangerous business Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road and if you don't keep your feet, there's no telling where you might be swept off to." There will be danger and discomfort and intrigue and joy. An interesting precedent is being set here; my desire is stronger than both my fear and apathy. In my current exhausted state anxiety is getting the better of me, but I am generally thrilled. My thoughts are ever bent toward the fall.
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